Spiritual Profanity 101: A Guide to Soul-Friendly Swearing

Let’s get real for…

Let’s get real for a second: We all have crap days. Those days where “namaste”, “god bless”, or “love is all you need” make you want to grind your teeth and punch a peace-sign-shaped hole in the wall. While we aim at keeping our emotions in check and rocking a balanced, enlightened state of calm all day, everyday, sometimes we just need to let out steam. Let’s face it, tantrums and venting can be good for the soul!

To help, here are my top seven soul-search-friendly profanities…

1. Go smudge yourself.

The ultimate burn for someone dishing out negativity like free crap ice-cream cones. Help them clean their energy with this little cleanser!

2. Get more lifetimes.

A comment for all the young souls out their who may have a big ego, play the bully card or just need to get themselves in check.

3. Hug a quartz already.

A good one to share with energy takers who may be unaware of the energy vortex they are becoming.

4. Namas’tay away from dickheads.

More of a personal positive mantra when confronted with what is known universally as a dickhead.

5. You need a karma credit check.

A great reminder for people: Are they being kind, generous, and loving?

6. Enlighten the f*** up.

A more frank up comment for those who need some straight shooting. There is no beating around the bush here, you have been dealt a dealing of light!

7. Get your aura in check yo!

A great vibe checkin for someone who may not realize their energy is knotted or muddled.

So when you have a day that makes your soul want to scream as if you have just stubbed your toe because you were too busy downing your kale-chia-goji smoothie and checking your angel oracle card app to notice your home altar, you now have a universe-friendly profanity list to dip into. You know, for when muttering “for-the-life-of-Bhajan!” just doesn’t cut it.

Emma-mildonEmma Mildon is an author, columnist, and spiritualist that specializes in spiritual research that she shares to her readers through her interactive website, app, and books. Giving her readers easy access to everything from spiritual scriptures across all religions, to different types of yoga to explore, crystals, feng shui right down to how to work out your astrology and numerology. Keep an eye out for her book ‘The Soul Searchers Handbook’ out later this year with Simon & Schuster USA or visit her website, emmamildon.com. You can also find Emma on TwitterFacebookInstagram, and Google+


Photo by Wael Chanab