{"id":52947,"date":"2016-04-29T14:32:57","date_gmt":"2016-04-29T18:32:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/?p=52947"},"modified":"2017-02-28T11:11:38","modified_gmt":"2017-02-28T16:11:38","slug":"reaching-out-to-reach-in","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wanderlust.com\/it\/journal\/reaching-out-to-reach-in\/","title":{"rendered":"Reaching Out to Reach In"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Elizabeth Crisci is a past Wanderlust presenter.\u00a0Join us this year\u00a0at a <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/festivals\" target=\"_blank\">Wanderlust Festival<\/a> or <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/108s\" target=\"_blank\">108<\/a>!<\/em><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>It\u2019s no secret that I enjoy casual conversation with friends as well as <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/journal\/unexpected-benefits-talking-to-strangers\/\" target=\"_blank\">strangers<\/a>. This wasn&#8217;t always the case.\u00a0In fact, being friendly and stretching those comfort zones is a part of my practice that I\u2019ve worked hard\u00a0to cultivate over time. Friendliness remains a part of my practice even now: There\u2019s no difference between being friendly to myself and being friendly to others. The days that I am not bright and shiny at the yoga studio\u00a0are the days\u00a0I&#8217;m being even harsher to myself. Over the years this harshness has shifted and I\u2019ve found more balance, but intimacy continues to be a work in progress for me.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not alone in feeling uncomfortable with intimacy, far from it actually. We all have a bit of discomfort when in new situations and we can all benefit from bringing <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/journal\/train-together-grow-together\/\" target=\"_blank\">mindfulness<\/a> to this resistance. Facing the\u00a0fear of talking to the person sitting next to us on the train is no different than facing our fear of a handstand. When we allow ourselves to feel\u00a0uncomfortable we allow ourselves to grow\u2014limiting this practice to the mat makes it less likely to happen there at all. Take one small step at a time, breathe deeply, observe how you\u2019re feeling, and step back if you need to. Down dog was probably uncomfortable to us all when we first met it, but in time it becomes a dear friend. Maybe the person on the mat next to you will become a dear friend in time, too.<\/p>\n<h3>Tantric Connection<\/h3>\n<p>When I think of connection, I think of my roots as a Tantric yogi. My first <a href=\"http:\/\/www.yoganonymous.com\/connecting-to-the-heart-my-experience-with-tantric-group-meditation\" target=\"_blank\">Tantric group meditation<\/a> may have been the\u00a0first moment\u00a0that I\u00a0truly experienced connectivity with a stranger, my own discomfort, and the blossoming on the other side of all that. According to the philosophy of Tantra, reaching out is no different than reaching in. Imagine two points on a circular track moving in opposite directions only to return to each other. This is the circular cycle of relationship and connectivity, where reaching out is also turning in.<\/p>\n<p>Experiencing each other without boundaries allows us to see the <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/journal\/rima-rabbath-on-karma-and-shared-experiences\/\" target=\"_blank\">sameness<\/a> in all beings. The qualities that you admire in your best friend also live in you, as do habits of others which\u00a0irk you. When you bring attention to your perception of another, you are actually seeing yourself reflected in them. Through this understanding we can use our experiences with others to guide our own evolution.<\/p>\n<p>This philosophy also helps us to become kinder and more accepting. Can you really fault your brother for interrupting when you yourself <a href=\"http:\/\/wanderlust.com\/journal\/are-you-listening-or-waiting-for-your-turn-to-speak\/\" target=\"_blank\">interrupt<\/a>? Or, instead, perhaps you can use each gentle nudge of annoyance as a chance to let it all go; both your irritation at the other as well as the habit within yourself. Just through the simple practice of noticing, breathing, and letting it go, you develop a kinder, lighter way of being.<\/p>\n<p>How do you begin this practice? Ask yourself, \u201cWhere and with whom can I practice being more generous with my attention?\u201d The next time you notice yourself rushing away from someone who is trying to connect, pause. What are you reacting to? Breathe. Listen. The smallest shift in the way we relate to one another can turn into the biggest change in your experience of the world. Welcome discomfort, welcome intimacy, welcome each other\u2014and\u00a0you&#8217;ll learn how to welcome yourself.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014<\/p>\n<p><em><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-20686\" src=\"http:\/\/live-wanderlust-fest.pantheonsite.io\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/elizabeth-crisci.jpg\" alt=\"elizabeth-crisci\" width=\"200\" height=\"250\" \/>Elizabeth Crisci is a yoga teacher and artist in Fairfield County, Connecticut. She is the creator of\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.love-by-e.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Love by E<\/a>, handmade gemstone mala and jewelry. She teaches in workshops, special events, and trainings in the Northeast in addition to a range of regular, weekly classes. She teaches smart and accessible yoga designed to make you feel good. She loves every minute of her work. You can find her writing and her teaching schedule on\u00a0<a title=\"Elizabeth Crisci\" href=\"http:\/\/elizabethcrisci.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">her website<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Use these Tantric tools to become kinder, gentler, and more compassionate\u2014especially with yourself.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":124,"featured_media":52948,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1056],"tags":[884,951,77,2037,2038,51],"class_list":["post-52947","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-vitality","tag-compassion","tag-kindness","tag-mindfulness","tag-tantic","tag-tools","tag-yoga-practice"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v18.0 (Yoast SEO v27.5) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ 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